- go to www.google.com
- type in "failure" without the quotes
- press the I'm feeling lucky button (instead of the google search one)
- REPOST, SEND IT, FWD, SHARE IT
- DO IT!!!!
Online "point and click" adventure where Manev comes from the party where he was real drunk and his car stops in the middle of the desert. Now it's up to you to fix the car and drive back home. Good luck!!!
[subbed by tia, eb, linda & lynn]
- You can now use <spoiler> and <hint> tags in comments for all your game walkthroughs and the like. As tafkam points out though this will probably also lead to a new feature of comment threads devoted to arguing about "you should have used spoiler tags", etc. Enjoy.
- As well as the long standing site rss newsfeed, there are now new rss comment feeds for the site gossip (all comments), and one for each comment thread (if you really want the latest hints on cwot, or whatever, delivered to your desktop - there's one for each of all the 1400+ articles!). If you don' t know what rss is and are interested in how to 'get it', try microsoft's simple guide, or this one from the bbc. My personal advice is to use the 'web clips' section of Google Desktop (a joy to use), or the in-built rss subscription features in FireFox or Opera (Internet Explorer 7 is also, heavily, rumoured to have rss support).
- The stylesheet selection for the PSP web browser (yes I got the v2.00 upgrade) has now been corrected. I'll be doing a lot more work on this in the future to get a better "screen fit" on the PSP if a flash player is released for the PSP (drop me a line if you know anything about this). For now it's fairly academic since you can't play half, well most all of, if I'm honest, the things I link to using a PSP. Incidently if you have your own web site and want to do something special for the PSP browser I got details of the user agent here.
- The stylesheet selection for Opera 8x has now been corrected so you don't have to be a wimp and impersonate MSIE or Mozilla (as an Opera user I'm ashamed how long it took me to do this - my solution up until now was to stick with version 7x on my main computer).
DON'T waste money on expensive ipods. Simply think of your favourite tune and hum it. If you want to "switch tracks", simply think of another song you like and hum that instead.
CINEMA goers. Please have consideration for pirate DVD viewers by having a pi$$ before the film starts.
RAPPERS. Avoid having to say 'know what I'm sayin' all the time by actually speaking clearly in the first place.
DON'T waste money on expensive paper shredders to avoid having your identity stolen. Simply place a few dog turds in the bin bags along with your old bank statements.
WORRIED that your teeth will be stained after a heavy night drinking red wine? Simply drink a bottle of white wine before going to bed to remove the stains
SOLDIERS Invest in a digital camera to avoid all that court martial tomfoolery after a trip to Trueprint.
MURDERERS Need to dispose of a body? Simply parcel it up and post it to yourself via DHL. You will never see it again.
BURGLARS. When fleeing from the police, run with your right arm sticking out at 90?, wrapped in a baby mattress in case they set one of their dogs on you.
EMPLOYERS Avoid hiring unlucky people by immediately tossing half the CVs into the bin.
MEN When listening to your favourite CD, simply turn up the sound to the volume you desire; then turn it down three notches. This will save your wife from having to do it.
GAMBLERS. For a new gambling opportunity, try sending £50 to yourself by Royal Mail.
BANGING two pistachio nutshells together gives the impression that a very small horse is approaching.
BLIND PEOPLE Give yourself at least a chance of seeing something by not wearing heavy dark glasses all the time.
ALCOHOL makes an ideal substitute for happiness.
DRIVERS. If a car breaks down or stalls in front of you, beep your horn and wave your arms frantically. This should help the car start and send them on their way.
PREVENT burglars stealing everything in the house by simply moving everything in the house into your bedroom when you go to bed. In the morning, simply move it all back again.
CAR thieves Don't be discouraged when nothing is on view. All the valuables may be hidden in the glove box or under a seat.
DEPRESSED people Instead of attempting suicide as a 'cry for help', simply shout 'Help!' thus saving money on paracetamol, etc.
MOTORISTS Avoid getting prosecuted for using your phone whilst driving. Simply pop your mobile inside a large shell and the police will think you are listening to the sea.
JEREMY Beadle When selling DVDs on your TV advert, hold the disks in your bigger hand so that they do not appear to be the size of laser disks.
SHOES last twice as long if only worn every other day.
SINGLE men Convince people that you have a girlfriend by standing outside Etam with several bags of shopping, looking at your watch and occasionally glancing inside.
BOIL an egg to perfection without costly egg timers by popping the egg into boiling water and driving away from your home at exactly 60 mph. After 3 miles, phone your wife and tell her to take the egg out the pan.
ALCOHOLICS don't worry where the next drink is coming from. Go to the pub, where a large selection is available at retail prices.
McDONALD'S Make your brown carrier bags green in colour so they blend in with the countryside after they've been thrown out of car windows.
EMPLOYEES - Have all your shits at work. Not only will you save money on toilet paper, but you'll also be getting paid for it.
LADIES - An empty aluminum cigar tube filled with angry wasps makes an inexpensive vibrator.
SCROOGES - Save money at Christmas by returning last year's cards to the sender, with the simple inscription "Same to you".
GENTLEMAN - Gauge the outside temperature using a 'plumometer'. Open your flies and dangling your plums in front of an open letterbox. If they shrink it is cold outside, if they go baggy it is warm, and if they remain the same size it is the same temperature outside as it is in the house.
PLUMBERS - Farts stored in a washing up liquid bottle can be ignited and used as an underwater welding torch for those tricky but essential emergency plug chain repairs.
MICRA DRIVERS - Attach a lighted sparkler to the roof of your car before starting a long journey. You drive the things like sodding dodgem cars anyway, so it may as well look like one.
ADVENTUROUS LOVERS - Sprinkle talcum powder on each other's rings, then lie on the floor and fart up in the air to send each other sexy 'bum-smoke signals' across the bedroom.
ANGLERS - Attach a helium balloon to your line and bait the hook with an acorn. Then sit under a tree and 'fish' for squirrels. An upturned laundry basket would make an ideal keep net, but don't forget to throw the squirrels back into the tree at the end of the day
SINGLE men. Get a glimpse of married life by taping Woman's Hour on Radio 4, then playing it back at a higher volume than the TV whilst trying to watch something on Discovery Wings.
ENJOY indoor snorkling by filling a bath with water, then removing the plug quickly putting your mouth over it and breathing through the overflow.
TIGHT- arsed blokes. At this time of year, only date girls called Natalie, Carol, Holly or Eve. Chances are their birthday is around Christmas and you won't have to shell out for a present until then, by which time they will probably have packed you in.
CONSTIPATED driving instructors. Alleviate your discomfort by disconnecting the dual controls on the car when instructing a new pupil. If a stronger laxative effect is required, do the same thing but with a female learner.
[subbed by hazel]
UPDATE: I should have mentioned before that this is the follow up to Swan's Room if you are thinking it looks familiar.